claudia & the mystery at the museum: for once, the dude with the hitler mustache is a good guy

the tagline is, “what kind of crook would steal art?” gosh, i don’t know! this one opens with janine being shocked–SHOCKED!–to discover claudia immersed in the sunday “new york times”. apparently they are featuring a story on a new art museum opening in stoneybrook. i call bullshit. i read the “new york times” every singleContinue reading “claudia & the mystery at the museum: for once, the dude with the hitler mustache is a good guy”

hamster baby(sitters club)

i am trying to read a book about chronic pain, called the pain chronicles, but it is tedious work. the language is so dense & flowery & needlessly pretentious. there’s all this crap about deer falling through ice & pain as a metaphorical response to romantic love…i hope it gets better. i hope i canContinue reading “hamster baby(sitters club)”

jessi’s gold medal…i wonder if she wins a gold medal?

sweet jeebus. the tyranny of painfully dull jessi books continues. & to top it off, this one gives away the ending right in the title. so, it’s once again summertime in stoneybrook. for like the sixth time, at least. & it’s time for the summer olympics. & stoneybrook middle school has organized a sports spectacularContinue reading “jessi’s gold medal…i wonder if she wins a gold medal?”

pens across america: stoneybrook shoulders the white man’s burden

this is my recap of babysitters club book #44, dawn’s big sleepover. this book is preposterous. the premise is that second- through fifth-graders at stoneybrook elementary school are participating in the pens across america program, & have been assigned pen pals. their pen pals all attend an elementary school on the zuni indian reservation. theContinue reading “pens across america: stoneybrook shoulders the white man’s burden”

missing tigger: a melodrama starring mary anne spier

ugh. mary anne spier at her worst. this is my educational & enlightening recap of babysitters club book #24, mary anne & the search for tigger . so, mary anne’s dad used to be kind of over-protective because he’s a single parent & was trying too hard to be both mom & dad to her.Continue reading “missing tigger: a melodrama starring mary anne spier”

stacey’s CHUD-free mistake

first, an aside: last night, i dreamed that i was a contestant on “project runway,” but we made clothes for cats instead of people. & everyone wanted my cat, charlotte, as a model, because she is large (“voluptuous” was the term used in the dream) & therefore served as a better stage for the designers’Continue reading “stacey’s CHUD-free mistake”

the crabigail review: underground

sorry, i haven’t posted in a while. & sorry, by pointing that out, i am subscribing to capitalist ethics pertaining to the free labor of maintaining a blog, & displaying fucked up personal relationship with the concepts of “productivity” & “disability” (a recent theme for me). i mailed off the last of the remaining paperContinue reading “the crabigail review: underground”

the crabigail review: cleaving

i write up descriptions of every book i read on my goodreads account (see blog sidebar for links), & i finally got around to writing up cleaving: a story of marriage, meat, & obsession, by julie powell, which i struggled through a few weeks ago. i gave it one star. & i decided to cross-postContinue reading “the crabigail review: cleaving”

2009: year in review

i have been filling out this survey at the end of the every year for damn near ten years. that makes me feel very old. 1. what did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before? lived in kansas. went whale-watching. owned a pair of high heels. had a lipstick shade (l’oreal’s “make meContinue reading “2009: year in review”